Hi. My name is Camille and I am addicted to food.
Seriously.
I love food. I love the taste of it. I never eat because I am hungry. I eat because it tastes good. I never NEED a second helping, I just take it because of the taste.
I am an emotional eater. I eat when I am happy and when I am sad. I eat to celebrate and I eat to mourn. I eat when I am bored, when I am stressed, when I am mad.
The thing is, I can't ever be free from food. If I was addicted to smoking, I could stop and never ever have another cigarette. If I was an alcoholic, I could stop drinking and never have another one.
But I can't stop eating. And I can't stop grocery shopping. I am around food all the time. It's in my house! I have 6 tubs of cookie dough in my freezer because The Teenager was selling them for a fund raiser. I can hear them calling my name right now.
And with the holidays coming up, there will be so much food and candy and sweets around. I really don't know what I am going to do. My mom can have one bite and it will satisfy her. Not me. I have to eat the whole thing, whether it's a bowl of ice cream or an entire large bag of Cheetos.
Before The Princess was born, I went to Weight Watchers and lost 36 pounds. I loved how I looked and felt. I know what to do. So why can't I do it again? Where is my motivation? I see women who look so cute in clothes and I say, "I would give anything to look like that." But obviously I wouldn't because I am still eating and still gaining.
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2 comments :
It's so hard. I'm not a one bite person either, but I'm working on it. Progress not perfection.
I totally understand. I wish I had the answer. I was just writing about how diet is a four-letter word.
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