I know it is hard for you young mothers to believe that almost before you can turn around, your children will be gone and you will be home alone with your husband.  You had better be sure you are developing the kind of love and friendship that will be delightful and enduring.  Let the children learn from your attitude that he is important.  Encourage him.  Be kind.  It is a rough world, and he, like everyone else, is fighting to survive.  Be cheerful.  Don’t be a whiner.

Marjorie Pay Hinckley

We have certain expectations of our children:

  • We expect them to go to church.  There have been times in their lives when they were younger that they have said they don’t want to go.  We just say, “I understand, but that’s what we do.”  So when they became teenagers, they know they are going. 
  • We expect them to be respectful.  We don’t let them talk bad about people, especially their dad and me.  We are not their friends, we are their parents and deserve respect.  They say Mr. and Mrs. and Brother and Sister.  We try very hard not to let them call adults by their first name.
  • We expect them to be present and on time for family prayer and scripture study every morning.  We believe this is a very important commandment which bonds our family together.  If they miss family prayer, they don’t get use of their cell phone that day. It’s great motivation to get them going every morning.
  • We expect them to get good grades.  They are very fortunate to all be extremely smart, and there is no excuse for bad grades.  If they are really struggling in a class and not understanding, that is one thing.  But if they are getting bad grades because they are lazy, that is a problem.  I check their grades several times a week, and if they fall below a B-, they lose their electronics until the grades go back up.
  • We expect them to fast on Fast Sunday.  This starts when they are little.  When they turn 6, they start fasting one meal, usually lunch.  When they turn 8, they fast both breakfast and lunch.  We talk a lot during they day about what they are fasting for (are they fasting, or are they going hungry).  This may seem a little young, but it gives them a good foundation to stand on when they get older. 
  • Basically, we expect them to obey the commandments.  We do work with them and help them understand why, and help them to develop their testimonies.
  • We expect them to practice their music instruments.  Thanks to my mother, I play they piano, so I have been able to teach them piano.  They will never be classical pianists, but if they can play the hymns, that is all I want.  They each also play another instrument, thanks to the music program at the schools.  The Teenager played the trumpet for 4 years, and now plays the guitar.  The Artist plays the drums, and is trying to learn the guitar.  The Chocoholic plays the flute.  And when The Princess is old enough, she will get to chose an instrument as well.
  • We expect them to help out around the house, including daily chores.  We have a chore chart which lists who has which chores that week, so they know when I say, for example, the table needs to be set, who is responsible for that.  It eliminates a lot of arguing.

What expectations do you have for your children?

I don’t know what will happen today, but I can choose to respond delightfully to anything that does happen, good or bad.

There is a quote going around on Pinterest which says, “Good moms have sticky floors, dirty ovens, and happy kids.” 

I take issue with that. 

I have clean floors.  My oven is clean (mostly).  I have clean bathrooms.  I have a clean kitchen.  My carpets are vacuumed.  Our bedrooms are clean. 

And my kids are happy.  I am a good mom.

Having happy kids does not mean I have to have a dirty house.  We work together to keep it clean.  We don’t spend all day cleaning, but we do clean everyday.

And we are all happy. 

So don’t try to make me feel guilty for having a clean house. 

The Spirit isn’t just there to make you nice while the world is beating you up. The Spirit is an infusion of enabling power and allows you to push back against the world.

President Joseph F. Smith stated:

“The Lord has given unto us garments of the holy priesthood, and you know what that means. And yet there are those of us who mutilate them, in order that we may follow the foolish, vain and (permit me to say) indecent practices of the world. In order that such people may imitate the fashions, they will not hesitate to mutilate that which should be held … sacred. … They should hold these things that God has given unto them sacred, unchanged and unaltered from the very pattern in which God gave them. Let us have the moral courage to stand against the opinions of fashion, and especially where fashion compels us to break a covenant and so commit a grievous sin” (“Fashion and the Violation of Covenants and Duty,” Improvement Era,Aug. 1906, p. 813).

Modesty is not just about covering your garments.  Too many think that if you can’t see the garments, you are okay.  Well, I don’t know about you, but my garments really don’t fit very well.  The cup size is always wrong, and they pull down in the front.  A lot.  So I could justify wearing lower cut shirts.  But that is living the letter of the law, not the spirit of the law. 

I don’t want to see your boob crack.  Neither do my teenage boys.  They have enough temptations to deal with.  They don’t need it from women who have been to the temple.  Please cover up.  If not for me, for my boys.

“And once the storm is over you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in.”

Haruki Murakami

I have a bit of a dilemma right now.  I am not sure where to go with my blog.  It’s not my journal.  I have a journal that I write in.  Every single day.  I also don’t like putting pictures on the internet.  I have heard of too many cases of pictures ending up where they shouldn’t.  And I don’t feel like anyone even reads this anymore.  No one wants to hear my opinion because I am too opinionated.  So many people in my ward read this blog, and I have caused too many hard feelings, so I don’t feel like I can even be honest here.  I’m thinking my time in the blogosphere is about over.  I have enough Sunday Quotes to last until next year, so every Sunday, check back and there will be something to read.  I might pop in once in a while, but it won’t be regular.

You don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to.