Waiting

After I got married, I was on birth control for 4 months, and then we decided that we were ready to start a family.  We tried for 4 months and then got pregnant with The Teenager.  With The Artist, I was on birth control for 9 months, and then we tried for 9 months before getting pregnant.  With The Chocoholic, I was on birth control for 12 months, and we got pregnant as soon as I went off the pill.  The very first month.  So when we decided we were ready to have baby #4, we knew it would be a piece of cake.  No big deal.  I had been on the pill for a year, so we knew we would be pregnant within a year. 

Well, 6 months came and went and we kept trying.  My cycle has never been regular, going anywhere from 3 weeks to 9 weeks between periods.  And they are very heavy.  I tried Clomid once, but at $25 for 5 pills, we couldn’t afford to do that again.  I had a D&C to make sure everything was okay, and it was.  I tried taking my temperature to see when I was ovulating.  I didn’t ovulate. 

A year came and went. Two years came and went.  3 years came and went.  Still nothing. I know that many people struggle with infertility for many more years than we did, but after 3 children, I didn’t understand why I couldn’t get pregnant. 

My doctor finally had a frank talk with me.  I have PCOS – PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome.  Basically, I don’t ovulate regularly, and because of my weight, it aggravated the problem.  He frankly told me I needed to lose weight.  He had mentioned it before, but I hadn’t really listened.  But this time I did.  I started going to Weight Watchers and in 4 months, I lost almost 40 pounds.

December 2003 came and The Doctor and I talked and decided that we were both feeling that we want to be done having children. After going with my sister to take her 2 month old baby to the doctor and remembering the stress of having a baby who isn’t sleeping and not knowing what is going on, I just didn’t want to do it anymore. The Chocoholic was 5 now, and we had really enjoyed having older children. And I really didn’t want kids 5 years apart.

So we decided to fast and ask Heavenly Father if that was the correct decision.  But neither of us got a definite answer, so we decided to wait and keep praying about it.

The day after Christmas, I was a witch.  I was mean, mean, mean.  More so than normal.  And that usually means one thing.  The Doctor bought a pregnancy test and I took it the next morning.  Yep, I was pregnant.  Which meant that the kids would be nearly 6 years apart. Six. years.  That’s a long time.

It took us 3 1/2 years to finally get pregnant.  That’s a long time.  It was a very stressful time in our marriage.  I just wanted to be pregnant, which was a righteous desire.  But I had to wait.  I didn’t know why then, and I still don’t know why now.  I can give you several reasons why it would have been easier if I had gotten pregnant sooner.  But for some reason, it wasn’t to be.  I will just put it on my list in my head of things to ask my Heavenly Father when I die!

Jam

Making jam when 8 months pregnant, working full time, no air conditioner, and it's 98 degrees at 9:00 at night is not a good idea. 

Let me elaborate.

It was 1993.  I was pregnant with The Teenager.  It was September and it was HOT!  That is one thing I miss about Idaho, it at least cools down at night there.  Here it just stays hot!  The particular night in question, it was 9:00 and still 98 degrees.  We had a 2 level apartment with a swamp cooler.  It didn't work all that well, and swamp coolers don't work when it's hot.  Just when it's warm.

The Doctor and I were both working full time and I would come home exhausted!  We had 2 bathrooms and when we got home, we would each hit one to do our business.  The Doctor would have to come in the bathroom and wake me up because I would fall asleep on the toilet. 

Some neighbors had a plum tree that had the most delicious plums, and they let us pick as many as we wanted.  So The Doctor had the idea to make jam.  And he decided this particular night that it had to be done that night.  I was less than thrilled, but he insisted.  So we started the jam.

It was before I learned to do freezer jam, so we were cooking it on the stove.  Come to think of it, this experience is the reason I don't do cooked jam!  Well, when jam starts to boil, it splatters.  And it's hot.

So there I am, tired, hot, pregnant, and mad that I have to make jam.  And then it splatters on me.  I freaked out and was yelling and crying and The Doctor was yelling and I told him to get out.

And he did.

He walked out and left me to finish the jam.  It was our first fight.  I had never yelled at him before.  I finished the jam and soon he came back.  We apologized to each other and we were okay, but it was bad at the time.

The lesson to be learned?  When you are pregnant and hot and tired, don't make jam!  And don't yell at your husband.  Nothing good comes from that.

My Fourth Born

1. Was your pregnancy planned? Yes, we tried for 3 1/2 years. Yes, that says years. It wasn't until I lost 36 pounds that I was able to get pregnant.
2. Were you married at the time? Yes.
3. What were your reactions? We were in shock. We had decided we were done because #3 was 5 years old. She slipped in just under the wire!
4. Was abortion an option for you? Never.
5. How old were you? 31
6. How did you find out you were pregnant? Home pregnancy test.
7. Who did you tell first? My hubby's mom. She was so excited for us. My mom and dad were gone on a trip, and I wanted to tell them before anyone else on my side of the family, so we waited a whole week before we could tell anyone on my side!
8. Did you want to find out the sex? Absolutely! And when the technician said it was a girl, I started laughing and crying. I was laughing so hard, my belly was shaking and she couldn't keep the wand on! It was funny!
9. What was your due date? August 20.
10. Did you have morning sickness? No.
11. What did you crave? ?
12. What irritated you? Everything!
13. What was the sex of your fourth child? A girl.
14. Did you wish you had the opposite sex of what you were getting? I felt guilty for being so happy that I was having a girl. If I had had another boy, I would have been happy too, and we even had a name picked out for him!
15. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy? 25
16. Did you have a baby shower? Yes. My mom and my aunt gave me one. It was so nice. They are classy women. Because she came early, the baby shower was 5 days after her birth. So of course I got to put on maternity clothes to go! LOL But it was nice because everyone held the baby and I just got to open presents without being the center of attention!
17. Were they a surprise? No.
18. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy? Nope.
19. Where did you give birth? At the hospital I had to give birth at because our insurance wouldn't cover the other hospital or my doctor that I loved!
20. How many hours were you in labor? My water broke in the shower that morning, and my hubby was teaching his last day of classes, so I called and told him. He taught his class (his students thought he was insane for not rushing home, but when it's your fourth, you kind of know what is going to happen!), and then came home. We got to the hospital at 11:00 and it was 1:30 when the doctor decided to start me on Pit. I didn't hardly even feel the contractions until 4:55. Then it was only 2 hours and 15 minutes of labor before she was born.
21. Who drove you to the hospital? My hubby, after he got home from teaching.
22. Who watched you give birth? My hubby and my mom.
23. Was it natural or c-section? Natural
24. Did you take medication to ease the pain? Nope. I started asking for an epidural and my hubby wouldn't let me. I am so glad too because it was only 15 minutes later that she was born.
25. How much did your child weigh? 7 lbs. 1 oz. My smallest baby!
28. When was your child actually born? August 13, 2004 at 7:12 p.m.
30. What did you name him/her? The Princess.

My Third Born

1. Was your pregnancy planned? Kind of. With #1, Ihad been on the pill for 4 months, and it took us 4 months to get pregnant. With #2, I had been on the pill for 7 months, and it took us 7 months to get pregnant. I had just started going back to school when we decided to start trying. I had been on the pill for 12 months, so we figured it would take us at least that long to get pregnant, and then with the pregnancy, I would almost be done with school when I was due. Well, Heavenly Father had other things in mind. I went off the pill and didn't even have a period before I got pregnant!
2. Were you married at the time? Yes.
3. What were your reactions? We were stunned. Yes, we were trying, but really weren't expecting it that quickly. And then the doctor said that when you get pregnant right off the pill, there is an increased chance for twins. He immediately took me to the ultrasound room and checked. Thank goodness there was only one!
4. Was abortion an option for you? Never
5. How old were you? 25
6. How did you find out you were pregnant? Home pregnancy test. I always get really cranky and mean and one night I was at my wit's end and I jokingly said, "I wonder if I am pregnant." Well, I had a test, so the next morning I peed on it and it was positive!
7. Who did you tell first? I don't know. We never kept them a surprise, so I am sure our parents.
8. Did you want to find out the sex? Definitely! I wanted a girl so badly. The pregnancy was so different from the other two that I just knew we were having a girl. I even went and bought girl clothes. The night before the ultrasound, I had The Doctor give me a blessing and I was blessed with peace. So the next day when they said it was a boy, I was okay. I did cry some, but I thought I was handling it. The day after that, I was watching Oprah and she had on a woman who had 10 children, all boys. I lost it! I sobbed for 2 hours! But by the time he was born, I was ready for him and wouldn't have traded him in!
9. What was your due date? December 13.
10. Did you have morning sickness? Just slightly nauseous.
11. What did you crave? Fruit.
12. What irritated you? Don't remember.
13. What was the sex of your third child? A boy.
14. Did you wish you had the opposite sex of what you were getting? See #8.
15. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy? 25
16. Did you have a baby shower? Nope.
17. Were they a surprise?
18. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy? I didn't, but the baby had Hydronephrosis. That is on my list of things to blog about. So stay tuned!
19. Where did you give birth? In the same hospital as #2.
20. How many hours were you in labor? I was induced, so from the time the needle finally got in my arm to the delivery was about 8 hours. But the first 3 hours don't count because the contractions didn't even hurt. It wasn't until the doctor broke my water that I started feeling them.
21. Who drove you to the hospital? My hubby. We had an appointment that morning to see if we should go ahead and do the induction, and when he said yes, we casually walked down the hall to the women's center. Much different than with #2!
22. Who watched you give birth? My hubby and my mom. I loved having her there.
23. Was it natural or c-section? Natural.
24. Did you take medication to ease the pain? At the end, I asked, no begged for an epidural. While it was going in, I started pushing. The nurse pushed my legs together and said I had to wait! But as soon as it was in, I flipped over and 2 minutes later he was born. So I still felt everything. We have figured out that when I start asking for an epidural, I am in transition!
25. How much did your child weigh? 8lbs exactly.
28. When was your child actually born? December 4, 1998 at 5:27 p.m.
30. What did you name him/her? The Chocoholic.

My Second Born

1. Was your pregnancy planned? Yes, we tried for 9 months
2. Were you married at the time? Yes.
3. What were your reactions? We were so excited!
4. Was abortion an option for you? Never.
5. How old were you? 23
6. How did you find out you were pregnant? Free pregnancy test at the hospital.
7. Who did you tell first? We told his mom first this time, then my mom.
8. Did you want to find out the sex? Yes. I had to know whether we needed to buy clothes or not.
9. What was your due date? October 24th.
10. Did you have morning sickness? Hardly at all.
11. What did you crave? Salty things. I ate a lot of Saltines.
12. What irritated you? I don't remember.
13. What was the sex of your second child? A boy.
14. Did you wish you had the opposite sex of what you were getting? Yes, I had my boy, now I wanted a girl.
15. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy? 40.
16. Did you have a baby shower? Nope.
17. Were they a surprise?
18. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy? Nope.
19. Where did you give birth? Almost at home or on the road, but we made it to the hospital, and I gave birth 6 minutes after arriving.
20. How many hours were you in labor? 3 1/2 hours.
21. Who drove you to the hospital? My hubby.
22. Who watched you give birth? My hubby. My mom was going to come, but I delivered too fast! The nurse delivered him because he wouldn't even wait for the doctor on call to arrive.
23. Was it natural or c-section? Natural
24. Did you take medication to ease the pain? No, it went too fast. I wasn't going to anyway.
25. How much did your child weigh? 8 lbs. 7 1/2 oz.
28. When was your child actually born? October 24th, 1996 at 7:03 a.m.
30. What did you name him/her? The Artist.

My First Born

1. Was your pregnancy planned? Oh yes, we tried for 3 1/2 months.
2. Were you married at the time? Yes.
3. What were your reactions? We were so excited. We cried and hugged.
4. Was abortion an option for you? Why would this questions even be here?
5. How old were you? 20 (by one month!)
6. How did you find out you were pregnant? We suspected, and used a pregnancy test.
7. Who did you tell first? My mom, then his mom. Then everyone else we could tell!
8. Did you want to find out the sex? Kind of, but we didn't.
9. What was your due date? October 11th.
10. Did you have morning sickness? I was nauseous, but I only threw up if I ate my breakfast too fast.
11. What did you crave? Sweets.
12. What irritated you? No clue.
13. What was the sex of your first child? A boy.
14. Did you wish you had the opposite sex of what you were getting? I really wanted a girl, but I was so happy to have a baby.
15. How many pounds did you gain throughout the pregnancy? 50. I took the whole "eating for two" very seriously!
16. Did you have a baby shower? Yes, the place I was working for gave me one.
17. Was it a surprise? No.
18. Did you have any complications during your pregnancy? Just too much weight gain!
19. Where did you give birth? At the hospital.
20. How many hours were you in labor? My water broke at 3:30 a.m. and we immediately went to the hospital. 3 hours later, they put me on Pit because I hadn't started contractions yet. 6 hours and 43 minutes later, he was born.
21. Who drove you to the hospital? The Doctor (meaning my husband, not the person who did the delivery! LOL).
22. Who watched you give birth? Just my hubby. I didn't want any family in with me.
23. Was it natural or c-section? Natural
24. Did you take medication to ease the pain? We had taken Lamaze, so I was able to work through most of the pain. I did end up taking two 1/2 doses of pain killer, and wish I hadn't because all it did was put me to sleep in between the contractions, so I couldn't get on top of them.
25. How much did your child weigh? 7 lbs. 8 1/2 oz.
28. When was your child actually born? October 5, 1993 at 1:12 p.m.
30. What did you name him/her? The Teenager. LOL Not really, but if you know me, you know his real name!